Sit back and warm up your tea

. I've had my :

Someone asked me today, "Where did the name 'Brown' come from? No one in your family is named Brown!" When the children were younger, I had to make a decision of whether to post photos on social media or not. I was finally a parent, and I wanted to share with the world what Turk and I had achieved. So when I finally made my choice to post photos , I had to figure out a creative way to do it yet still protect their identities.

For many years I gave my 1st grade students nicknames (Snow Bunny, Little Bit, Lovebug, etc.) as terms of endearment. So when we brought Nich home, I just continued with that same thought process because he, and any children that we hoped to have for that matter, was my heart and soul. So he became my Little Brown Boy.

This went on for about 4 years, until one day he asked, "Mommy, why do you call me Little Brown Boy? My friends keep asking me and I don't know why."

Me: "Well, first of all you tell your friends that Little Brown Boy is your mommy's nickname for you, and only I can call you that. Ok?"

Him: "Yes ma'am. But why?"

Me: "Well, aren't you little?"

*Yes.

*Aren't you 'brown' like a crayon?

* yes ma'am!!

*And, aren't you a BOY?

* YES, MA'AM! I am a boy!

*OK! There you go! You're my Little Brown Boy! And it's because I love you!

*I love you, too, Mommy!

Well, when the twins came along, I started using various nicknames for them. Because we were still in the pre-adoption phase, we did not have permission to use their 'new' names until parental rights had been terminated. So for the first seven months, our little man was solely called 'Buttons' (because he had a sweet button nose). We could not come up with a single, fitting nickname for our little miss, so she was 'Myrtle', 'Sweetpea', 'Dollface', 'Sugarfoot' (which was MY nickname that my Uncle Charlie gave me), 'Pooh', 'Diva' (the one that did fit her best)....basically ANYTHING that fell out of my mouth! Once TPR was complete, we began using their permanent names and my at home term of endearment for all 3 became my biscuit brown babies!

When Nich entered 4th grade, his teacher Melonie Reed overheard me call him Little Brown Boy one afternoon, and, like most people, inquired why. I shared my nickname story; she smiled and said, "Now, Mom, he's getting older. You shouldn't use nicknames that will embarrass him in front of his peers." As a teacher, I knew she was right; I had waved my finger at many a parent for calling his/her child by a family/childhood nickname once entering public school. But he was my heart...my baby...what was I going to do???

When I shared my and Mrs. Reed's conversation with Nich, he replied, "Well, Mom. What are you going to do? You've always called me L.B.B. And I really am not that little anymore; I'm big. So I guess I'll be your Big Brown Boy, and Sean can be Little Brown Boy."

As they grew and although slightly modified, their nicknames became a little more private - using them primarily at home and/or when I needed to identify them on social media platforms. But regardless of when or where I used the names, they were always ALWAYS my term of endearment for my three heartbeats: Oldest brown , Diva, and Little Brown.

 Grab a

In my youth, I called myself a nerd because I didn't do, act, behave exactly like everyone around me. As an adult I have oftentimes said I was strange...an odd-bird...just different than other adults my age...yes, I've even said I was weird. Don't worry... I know/knew friends never perceived me as any of those connotations (at least to my face). So I taught my students and raised my three browns to be the exact same way (because THIS generation can be a little bit 'extra' but I digress)... I told them, especially oldest brown, that it was okay NOT to be like everyone else; they could be in the in-crowd, yet not do 'everything' the in-crowd does.

This last week has taught me alot about myself. I do express myself, act, react and, yes, BEHAVE differently than others in extreme situations. No, I have not been a constant weeping mess when visitors arrived. That doesn't mean I haven't cried, because I have ....gallons and gallons....and I won't stop in the foreseeable future. No I'm not suppressing my feelings and emotions when people embrace me (as one of our first visitors alleged last week when I didn't sob on demand you are not going to force me to cry ...but I digress again!). This quote fits me to a totally straight, UPPERCASE T : I am not defective, weird, or a lost cause...I am resilient. And that is not a bad thing....